Why Seinfeld's Theme Song Changed In Every Episode

What is the deal with the "Seinfeld" opening theme music? What? They couldn't afford to record an actual theme sequence? Remember "The Brady Bunch"? And how that theme song explained everything you needed to know about the show? "The Brady Bunch" even had a handy 3x3 grid of all the characters, so you could keep everyone straight. "Seinfeld" just had some bass grooves and some guy beatboxing, just kind of freestylin' it. You'd think they could at least write some lyrics. "Here's Jerry. He's neurotic and selfish. Here's George. He's neurotic and selfish." Kinda writes itself!

Jerry Seinfeld impersonations aside, the "Seinfeld" theme music was always unique. It was constructed out of beatboxing, some electronic harmonica-like noises, and a lot of electric bass, and it was never the same from episode to episode. The music was performed by musician Jonathan Wolff, who also composed music for sitcoms like "Who's the Boss?," "Will & Grace," "Married... with Children," and "The King of Queens." Wolff never composed a single "Seinfeld" theme song, instead using a peppy, changeable rock riff. The riffs tended to be of varying lengths, as they would have to be played underneath one of Jerry Seinfeld's stand-up bits. 

"Seinfeld" was ostensibly built around these bits. The premise of the show, such as it is, was that Jerry was living an odd and neurotic life, and his everyday experiences would eventually form the basis of his in-show stand-up career. Jerry's stand-up served as a thematic intro for each episode. Because Jerry's bits were different lengths, however, the background theme music had to be lengthened and shortened accordingly.

In a video interview with "Great Big Story," Wolff talked about his work on "Seinfeld," and how he had to write a piece of music that would have to be anywhere from 20 seconds to a minute to accommodate the small introductory segments. A handy, single 90-second song was not feasible under the circumstances.

Some famous TV shows already played shortened versions of pop songs, usually snipping a three-minute hit into a 45-second chunk (see: "Friends," "Full House," et al). Many TV theme songs, you'll find, have an "extended version" somewhere out in the world. "Seinfeld," however, didn't have the leeway of only two different musical mixes. It needed a new one for each episode. Wolff, then, merely riffed a new theme for every episode on his synthesizer, and using his own finger snaps, mouth, and breath. As Wolff described it:

"I have no idea how many themes we did for 'Seinfeld.' I knew that each monologue was going to be different; 'Cause he tells different jokes! The timing, the length had to be adjustable in a way that would even still hold water and still sound like the 'Seinfeld' theme. So each monologue had its own recording of the 'Seinfeld' theme to match those timings."

Speaking of timing, Wolff's theme song wasn't just a wild, open-ended riff, but based very specifically on Jerry Seinfeld's delivery style. It seems that Seinfeld, perhaps without realizing it, tended to speak and deliver his jokes in a very musical cadence. Wolff notices that one could set a metronome to Seinfeld's delivery. He continued: 

"I watched his HBO special, and noticed that Jerry has a lyrical delivery to his jokes. And I put a clock on it. About 110 [beats per minute]. And that became the tempo of the 'Seinfeld' theme. The bass line for 'Seinfeld' was so simple, it can stop and start for his jokes, hold for laughs. And in that way I could architect each piece of music for each monologue, LEGO-style." 

Wolff also noted that the network — perhaps predictably — hated his improvisational style, finding it annoying. Luckily, "Seinfeld" co-creator Larry David went to bat for Wolff, insisting that the "annoying" music stay. David felt that NBC was screwing things up anyway. Thanks to David, Wolff kept his job. These days, the bass riffs on "Seinfeld" are as famous as its actors.