Star Wars Legend Carrie Fisher Wrote A Banned Oscars Sketch

At the 74th Academy Awards, held to honor the films of 2001, Peter Jackson's fantasy epic "The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring" was nominated for a whopping 13 awards, including Best Picture. It ultimately won four Oscars, signaling that fantasy films were now considered major prestige fare; traditionally, the Oscars have been drawn to biographies, histories, and dramas of a personal nature. For the purposes of this article, I will remind readers that "Fellowship" lost its award for Best Original Song to "If I Didn't Have You" from "Monsters, Inc." The "Fellowship" song was a wispy, dream folk-like lullaby called "May It Be," written by Nicky Ryan, Roma Ryan, and noted dream-rock chanteuse Enya. 

The televised Oscar ceremony that year was hosted by Whoopi Goldberg, and she brought the right balance of reverence and irreverence to the evening. The show was directed by Louis J. Horovitz and sported 18 credited writers, all of them with impressive pedigrees. The head writer was Bruce Vilanch, who has written many, many Oscar-casts, TV specials, comedy sketches, and Lord knows what else. Also on the writing roster were Wanda Sykes, Rita Rudner, James Cameron, Cameron Crowe, Buck Henry, David Mamet, and others. 

For those unfamiliar with her award show career, Carrie Fisher also contributed to the Oscars a few times, notably for the 69th, 74th, and 79th telecasts. For the 69th show, she even appeared on stage to be admonished by her own mother, Debbie Reynolds, for writing "drivel" for the show. 

Fisher, always a sardonic soul, knew that Enya had been nominated for an Oscar that year, and decided to write a joke at the songwriter's expense. Bruce Vilanch talked about Fisher's Enya gag in a 2017 interview with People Magazine. It seems the gag went over well with everyone ... almost.

Vilanch, an old pro when it came to comedy writing, had a huge network of friends in Hollywood and was in a great spot to reach out to Fisher. (Vilanch, it should be noted, was also a contributing writer to "The Star Wars Holiday Special," which starred Fisher.) He recalled that neither he nor any of the other Oscar writers seemed to be terribly fond of Enya's song from "The Fellowship of the Ring," feeling it sounded less like an emotional ballad, and more like something one might hear on the sound system at a spa. Fisher had the perfect joke for the song, as Vilanch recalled: 

"I brought Carrie onto the Oscar show writing team. Whoopi was hosting and we were trying to figure out funny things for her to do. Enya had written a song that was nominated, and it was a typical Enya song, the kind that someone noted you only hear when you're getting a massage. So we thought it would be funny if, after about 16 bars, a little curtain was raised on one side of the stage and there would be Whoopi, getting a massage." 

What would follow was, by Fisher's estimation, a "Rockettes-type massage table number, huge and elaborate." Given the bold earnestness of Jackson's "The Lord of the Rings" movies and the dreamy, serious, po-faced tone of most of Enya's catalog, a wild, Rockettes-style dance routine would have been a fun lampoon, something that the movie stars in the Oscars audience could have a hearty chuckle at. 

But, according to Vilanch, "Everybody loved it except Enya. You never saw it." Enya didn't appreciate the comparison.

It seems that Fisher, who was in attendance at the Oscars, was a deeply beloved figure to see backstage. Vilanch liked how much she interacted with all the visiting actors, and noted that Fisher was a hugger. Vilanch invited her back five years later for the 79th Oscars, the year "The Departed" won Best Picture, to write again. It seems, however, that Fisher's fashion choice caused no small amount of headaches for director Horvitz. It seems that Fisher sparkled so much, she just had to spread it around. As Vilanch recalls: 

"A few years later, Carrie was back on the team. On the night of the show, she arrived in a black tux pantsuit, her hair and shoulders festooned with gold glitter. I had assigned her to the green room, where people wait before they go on the air, because everybody knew her and she was a reassuring presence to a lot of actors ... Of course, she hugged them all. After we'd been on the air about 20 minutes, the director called me, shrieking, 'Tell her to stop hugging people! This looks like the god**** Tinker Bell special! Everybody's covered in glitter!'"

Fisher passed in 2016 at the age of only 60. In her memoir, "Wishful Drinking," Fisher wanted it said that, when she dies, "I want it reported that I drowned in moonlight, strangled by my own bra." Bustle reported her death just as requested. Fisher was a cool, cool person, and Vilanch talks about her with friendliness and awe. The world lost a legend. Damn that bra.