Why Doctor Who's Beatles Episode Doesn't Have Any Beatles Songs In It

The second episode of the new "Doctor Who" season (and the best episode of the two-part premiere) starts off with what is basically just one giant meta joke. The Doctor is pleasantly surprised when Ruby asks for him to take them to watch the Beatles as they record their first album. He tells her that most companions pick basic, predictable destinations like the Titanic or Mars, and then marvels, "Why haven't I ever done this before?"

The answer is surprisingly simple: The Titanic disaster is public domain, but the Beatles' music is not. "Doctor Who," a show that is famous for its shoestring budget and its wobbling sets, has likely never been able to afford the licensing fee required just to play one of the band's songs. Whereas most bands only charge in the $25,000 to $50,000 range for a TV show to use a song of theirs — which is already pushing it for "Doctor Who" — the Beatles have always dialed it up a notch, generally charging in the six figures. When "Mad Men" used "Tomorrow Never Knows" from the band's "Revolver" album in season 5, it cost the show $250,000.

Was it worth it? In that case, yes: The song perfectly represents the strange new world that the mid-'60s promised, which might be why a disconcerted, change-resistant Don Draper chooses to turn the song off halfway through. He wants things to stay as they were, but as the song returns at full volume in the end credits, it's clear there's nothing he can do to stop the future. "Mad Men" would play the Beatles just this once throughout its whole 7-season run, but they certainly made the most of it. 

Although "Doctor Who" couldn't afford Beatles music throughout its first 60 years on TV, the show's recent deal with Disney made us wonder if maybe this time things were different. With a mega-corporation backing the show, maybe "Doctor Who" would have proper "f*** you" money for the first time in its run, enough to play a song purely to flex their newfound monetary freedom. 

Alas, this was not the case: The Doctor and Ruby travel back to the band's first album recording only to discover that Maestro (Jinkx Monsoon), the charmingly devious villain of the week, has stolen the whole world's love for music. The Beatles are now singing a song written by the show writers themselves, and it's intentionally terrible. This introduces the main plot of the episode, where the Doctor and Ruby attempt to undo the damage Maestro's done and bring the lovely, expensive music of the Beatles back into the world. 

It's another fun example of the show making the best of their budget limitations. Can't include Beatles' music? Well, let's just make a whole episode based around denying the Doctor and Ruby their chance to listen to the Beatles. The result is the show's first proper musical episode, with songs that were composed in-house. It's one of the most creative stories the "Doctor Who" has ever given us, and a promising sign of the season to come.

Some Beatles fans might've been disappointed by the lack of Beatles music here, but long-term Whovians know that this show was never going to spent a quarter of a million dollars on a single song. "Doctor Who" might have a much bigger budget these days, but the charming penny-pinching mindset of its early years is here to stay.