John Candy Brilliantly Channeled Orson Welles For Billy Crystal's Short-Lived TV Show
"The Billy Crystal Comedy Hour" is likely not remembered by many people, except for Billy Crystal himself. The variety/talk show ran from January 30 through February 27 in 1982, lasting a grand total of five episodes. Crystal was already a successful comedian and beloved figure in the industry thanks to the popularity of his 1970s stand-up work and his role in the 1977 sitcom "Soap," so he had connections. He was able to secure guest appearances from many of his famous comedian friends, including Rick Moranis, Dave Thomas, Robin Williams, and John Candy for the debut episode. Subsequent guests included Morgan Fairchild, the Manhattan Transfer, Nell Carter, Shelley Duvall, Cindy Williams, Al Jarreau, and Smokey Robinson.
"The Billy Crystal Comedy Hour" fell right in between "Soap" and "Saturday Night Live" on Crystal's professional timeline, and it might be considered something of a dip in his career. The show was canceled after only two episodes aired, and NBC barely deigned to run three more before yanking it from the airwaves. There was also a sixth episode that remains unaired to this day. Crystal was dismayed at the show's unpopularity and has nothing but bad memories, especially since he had many, darker, edgier ideas for "Comedy Hour," but the execs at NBC insisted on something softer and friendlier.
In the pilot episode, there was one notably hilarious sketch with Crystal talking to Orson Welles, as played by John Candy. The future "Uncle Buck" star was lampooning early-'80s Orson Welles, the commercial hack, blowhard, and insufferable would-be intellectual. Audiences of the '80s might have even known about his infamous Frozen Peas commercials, the outtakes from which have proliferated around the internet, and were even spoofed on TV shows like "The Critic" and "Animaniacs." Incidentally, both of those examples were voiced by "Futurama" star Maurice LaMarche.
Candy nailed it.
Yes, always
The Orson Welles sketch had Candy emerging from backstage (yelling to an off-screen stagehand, "Don't ever push me!") sporting a long grey beard and smoking a cigar. In Welles-ian fashion, Candy snarled at people offstage, pointing to crew members and asking Crystal who they were. When Crystal clarified that one of the panicked crew members was the show's director, Candy condescendingly said, "That? Is a director?" He insists to the director that he did indeed hit his mark. "Yes," he says, "always."
"Welles" then proceeded to perform a magic trick, but it was massively complicated and involved Crystal writing down 62 numbers on a slip of paper, along with the model of a car and his least favorite animal. Crystal, trying to keep the show moving, encouraged Welles to work on the results of the trick in the green room. Welles refused. Crystal mentioned there's free food in the green room, and Welles took off.
Welles had a perfectly smug attitude late in his career, desperate for funding for his projects but spiteful toward the Hollywood machine. A lot of his character was documented in Morgan Neville's 2018 documentary "They'll Love Me When I'm Dead," a film about the making of Welles' final film "The Other Side of the Wind." Anyone who has seen that documentary can attest to Candy's accuracy. This was before the above-mentioned Maurice LaMarche began presenting his dead-on Orson Welles impersonations to the world, plying it to play The Brain on the "Pinky and the Brain" segments on "Animaniacs."
But even with brilliance like Candy as Welles, in an interview with the Television Academy Foundation, Crystal had to remind his interviewer that he did indeed have his own show in between "Soap" and "Saturday Night Live."
Killed by the Love Boat
Crystal was okay with the show — he didn't love it — but he was frustrated with how it was immediately met with resistance from NBC. He said:
"I had my own variety show on NBC. 'Soap' was canceled in 1980. Brandon Tartikoff, who was the head of NBC and a wonderful guy — a very funny young creative talent running a network — comes to me with the thought of doing a variety show. So, we make a deal for six shows of 'The Billy Crystal Comedy Hour.' We were coming out in the summer, and we'd see how it went. So we taped the first two, and they're ... okay. But those shows take a while to develop. [And here] was the problem: I wanted to be edgier and they wanted Carol Burnett."
It didn't help that "The Billy Crystal Comedy Hour" was scheduled to run opposite some of the hottest TV shows of the day. He also recalled that their big "get," Rock Hudson, had to be axed from the program because of a serious health condition. Everything fell apart very quickly. Crystal continued:
"[W]e tape the first two, and then Rock Hudson has a heart attack. His show was supposed to come on, and he's not available to work. [NBC said] 'Well, you got two in the can, you're on.' So from a week of promotion, we had no fanfare. We came on Saturday nights opposite 'Fantasy Island' and 'The Love Boat.' The show gets good reviews. Two shows air. Nobody's watching. Because of the 'Fantasy Island'/'Love Boat' thing. We get canceled after two. They aired five of the six. And that really hurt."
Episodes are hard to find now, but the Candy/Welles bit survives on YouTube.