Celebrities Will Do Absurd Things For You Via New Auction To Benefit Film Crews During Strike

Have you ever imagined what it would be like to take a pottery class with Busy Phillips? Or have dinner straight out of "Mr. Show" with Bob Odenkirk AND David Cross? Perhaps you'd like some help on the New York Times Sunday crossword puzzle with "Poker Face" star Natasha Lyonne? Maybe, just maybe, you're the kind of person who dreams of Adam Scott walking your dog, or of admiring a watercolor painting of your dog created by six-time Emmy-winner John Lithgow. If any of these oddly specific situations have you screaming out, "Yes! That's me! I am the person who dreams of these things!", I've got some unbelievably great news for you.

The Union Solidarity Coalition is a collection of writers and directors on strike who are raising funds for crew healthcare. The majority of the entertainment industry has been effectively shut down for over 100 days now following the AMPTP's failure to negotiate a fair deal with both the WGA and SAG-AFTRA, which means that all of the crew members who are pivotal to the production process are also out of work. As a means of raising funds, the organization is hosting The Union Solidarity Coalition Charity Campaign on eBay, and all of the proceeds benefit the Motion Picture & Television Fund to provide healthcare for IATSE, LIUNA, and Teamsters. Charity events are always a great thing to highlight, and solidarity during the strikes is more important than ever, but also, the things up for auction are equal parts once-in-a-lifetime opportunities ... and absolutely banana cakes unreal.

Quick, someone gift me a cool couple grand so I can have lunch with beloved character actress Ann Dowd in New York City. Oh, and also the money for a flight from Los Angeles to New York City so I can actually attend. It's for a good cause!

This isn't to shade other celebrity auctions, but typically speaking ... it's usually just a bunch of random junk lying around someone's storage unit that they slap a John Hancock on and call it a day. This is absolutely not the case for the Union Solidarity Coalition Charity Campaign. Here are just a handful of the auction items up for grabs (including the ones above that are also still available):

• The cast of "Bob's Burgers" will sing a song written just for you.
• Lena Dunham will paint a mural in your home.
• Rosemarie Dewitt and Ron Livingston will give you relationship advice.
• Virtual hangouts with the casts of shows like "New Girl" and "Bones."
• Tom Waits' personal fedora.
• Zoom sessions with folks like Sarah Silverman, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Rachel Bloom, Ally Pankiw, Barry Jenkins & Nicholas Britell, and Liz Feldman. 
• An official "Weird" Hawaiian shirt signed by Daniel Radcliffe and Weird Al.
• A blue apron from "The Bear" signed by Jeremy Allen White, Ebon Moss-Bachrach, Ayo Edebiri, and more.

Yes, these items will set you back a pretty penny, but lest we forget, we're in America and don't have universal healthcare, so some of these $500 minimums will pay for like, a single ambulance ride and some prescription antibiotics.

To place your bids and see the full list of available auctions, the eBay listing is here.