First Non-Holographic Official Image Of Snoke Is Here To Light A Fire Under Your Stupid Theories

Andy Serkis' Supreme Leader Snoke was introduced in Star Wars: The Force Awakens as a slightly fuzzy hologram towering over Kylo Ren. Naturally, fans got to work with Photoshop, brightening screen shots and generally doing everything in their power to get a closer and clearer look at the villain pulling the strings of the First Order. Cue a large number of (mostly absurd) fan theories concerning where this Big Bad came from.

Now, after toys and leaked images have further teased the Supreme Leader, the first official, non-holographic look at Snoke has arrived via, you guessed it, Star Wars merchandise.

Supreme Leader Snoke will have a much larger role in Star Wars: The Last Jedi and we're going to meet him in the flesh. And as this new Topps digital trading card makes abundantly clear, he's just as ugly in person as he is in hologram form. He also looks pretty angry, but that's understandable – this guy has a permanent case of "looking really ugly and gross and eww what's that giant scar in his head?"

I count myself among those who felt that Snoke's scenes in The Force Awakens were a speed bump in an otherwise extremely entertaining movie, so I'm curious how Rian Johnson intends to make me care about this character. Or care about hating him. Or something. I do like his slightly sparkly robe, which is a nice change of pace from the traditional solid black of Star Wars villains. The man's got a little more style than Palpatine did.

However, Johnson has made it clear that his movie won't fill in much of Snoke's backstory, leaving that task to whoever gets saddled with Star Wars: Episode 9. So that means the fan theorizing will persist for at least another two years! Is he actually, somehow...a still living Anakin Skywalker?! Or maybe he's just a brand new villain with a fresh backstory that is in no way connected to existing Star Wars mythology because sometimes new characters can be a breath of fresh air and present new opportunities rather than force a long running franchise to devour itself on a quest to feed nostalgic fans rather than create new ones?

Anyway, Star Wars: The Last Jedi opens on December 15, 2017. But you'll probably have to wait until Star Wars: Episode 9 comes out to learn that your stupid Snoke theory holds no water at all. Sorry.