LOL: The Totally True And Not-Made-Up Story Of How Captain Phasma Got Her Armor
Star Wars: The Force Awakens is a good movie, but let's not pretend that it's free of sin. Here is a superbly crafted movie full of terrific actors giving wonderful performances, but you can fill a few buckets with the nitpicks you collect while watching it. Some you can brush off. Others stick in you, tear at your skin, and leave a little mark that makes you wonder what everyone was thinking.
Let's turn our focus to Captain Phasma, the chrome-plated stormtrooper who was placed front and center in so much marketing (and in the toy aisle), only to literally do nothing of consequence in the final film. However, we can all agree on two things: that sure is some cool armor and actress Gwendoline Christie sure wears it well. But where did this suit of armor come from? Who made it? Who gave it to her? It turns out that Captain Phasma's armor has a totally true origin story that actually happened and isn't a silly video cooked up for internet laughs. Honest! And you can watch it below.
It turns out – and you may not be ready for this, so hold on to your butts – that Captain Phasma is the missing link between the Star Wars universe and the Game of Thrones universe. Yep, it's no accident that Gwendoline Christie plays the noble Brienne of Tarth of HBO's beloved fantasy drama series and the ruthless Captain Phasma in The Force Awakens. It turns out that they are one in the same! And that her chrome armor was gifted to her by her on-again, off-again frenemy Jaime Lannister!
You may be scoffing. You may not believe that Disney and HBO have secretly teamed up to merge their lucrative universes. But there is proof! And that proof this is piece of footage, smuggled out of wherever it was hidden by a team of Bothan spies.
As you surely and hopefully realized, this video is a just a fun gag cooked up by YouTuber levellord (and it's also a slooow news day). For comparison, here's the original scene from Game of Thrones, where Nikolaj Coster-Waldau's Jaime gifts Brienne with a new sword and an impressive set of armor.
If you watch that scene and feel a sudden stabbing sensation in your gut, that's just your body reminding you how annoying it is that an actress of Christie's caliber was so wasted in The Force Awakens. Imagine the fun/silly fan videos that could be made if Phasma were a proper character and not wallpaper! Thankfully, Lucasfilm president Kathleen Kennedy promises that Phasma will play a larger role in Star Wars: Episode 8. In the meantime, let's pull a Patton-Oswalt-on-Parks-and-Recreation and imagine a scenario where Westeros and the Star Wars galaxy manage to co-exist and Bronn can duel Kylo Ren.